Since then 'tis centuries

Twenty years ago today I became a fan. Possibly I'm still one: one shouldn't confuse fandom with production, though production is one of the nicest aspects of fandom and its lack always feel like the thrill has gone. On my fifth anniversary I wasn't feeling very fannish and wasn't writing much, but on my tenth and fifteenth I was deep in dragons and Woxin, respectively, and as far as I can recall only vaguely noticed what day it was. Now, well, I lack the hormones that gave such impetus to my first becoming a fan, but sometimes I can almost remember the vision of erotesis that burst on me on that drizzly Saturday night in Tokyo-- the shift into a new and different universe completely.

It seems meditation has taken the place of anime/manga hawtness. Time was, when I woke in the morning and lay half-awake in my snuggly bed, I'd turn into a character or two and watch them interact and listen to their conversations, which sometimes I'd remember enough of to work into the current story. Now I count my breaths and think of nothing. And sometimes this leads to the same sense of Elsewhere as before and sometimes it doesn't; but like story-telling it gives me something to do in the lulls of life.

(Walking too-- used to plot stories, now I watch my breath. Walking is good though-- lets me hear crickets and cicadas, and watch orange full moons rise over the currently heat-hazy city, and occasionally remember other summer nights, reading the kappa manga in '03, or walking to Tasty's in '01, or other times even longer ago than that.)
( Cut for Wednesday meme )